Do you still have your period?
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I need to align my fucking chakras
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
