the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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