I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
