I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
