Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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