you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize