The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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