I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
