i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Randomize
