I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
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