is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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