dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
