i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
