well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
