oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
