She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
