does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
