Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
