New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
