everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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