You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize