Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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