This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
