yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
