**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
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