look no pants
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
