Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
