She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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