She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Are my feet made of real feet?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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