You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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