Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
