Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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