First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
