Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
