I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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