You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
