It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
