I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
