I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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