why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
