so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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