Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
