this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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