I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize