so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
