Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize