dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
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