Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
