she kept yelling 'call me bella'
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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