I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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